A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, then suddenly dies of a heart attack.

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What do you call a rapist who uses condoms and excessive lubricant? A Rapist.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? Whatever you like, it can't hear you.

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How do you drown a blonde. I recommend that you do not drown a blonde because it is a felony. You could face 30-35 years in prison.

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Why did they save the man in a burning building? To arrest him for arson.

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a horse walks into a bar. Noticing the potentially dangerous situation everyone leaves, the bartender calls RSPCA who come and retrieve the horse and order is restored.

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Are you gay? No. Ok.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying Cut its head off

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Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

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How do you know if you have a good slave? It is hard working and determined... And black

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what did the poor guy get for christmas POVERTY

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Dyslexic drunk died choking on his own vimto last night

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Pretty vague, if I did not know you, Id conclude you where working for some mob syndicate or something.

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Why did to plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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A guy walks into a bar. He goes to the hospital with a severe head injury and dies.

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You know what a thief's kid receive on christmas? Your bike!

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Huh, I never succeeded in any of those, and I tried a lot. Please tell me you never gone with something nasty like that...

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what's worse than fining out that the best and worst jokes on anti-joke.com are about the Holocaust The Holocaust

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Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

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An obese man walked into McDonalds and ordered 6 Big Macs. He proceeded to walk to a booth in the back corner and eat them all. Turns out he was white.

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What's the difference between you and a sick duck? I forget the rest but your mother's a whore.

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your mom is so annoying that she has no freinds and lives alone crying every night about how her children abandoned her

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A Muslim walks into a Bar, He buys everyone a round of drinks and enjoys the rest of his night

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What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? . . . . . . . Roberto

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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