what did michael jackson do when i swore at him? nothing he's dead

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What did the Jewish man say to the banana? Nothing, because he has common sense

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What happens when a black man dies in France? A funeral procession.

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why'd the chicken committed suicide?? to get to the other side

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What did the gay kid in high school say? I'm straight.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? answer: Where's my tractor?

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How many Terry Pratchetts does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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why did the asian man get straight A's? because he worked hard and studied everyday

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Q: What's green, red, and covered in cookie crumbs? A: A dead girl scout.

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Poker face

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Who's the best player in Madden 07 on the PS2? Michael Vick.

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Q:Why do you never run over black guy on a bicycle A: Because that is not a very nice thing to do

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Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

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How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

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View Terms of Service

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Why do fishermen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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a man checks his mypsace

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Why did the little girl keep running into things Because she was blind

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Why was the Black man running with a T.V.? Because he had just purchased a new LCD FlatScreen from BestBuy, and a torrential downpour had just began and he didn't have a free hand to hold up his umbrella.

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Where did the girl go when a bomb was dropped on her? Everywhere

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A deer. The fact that it has no eyes doesn't change the species.

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why girl die cancer

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knock knock! who is there? its knock! knock who??? knock knock... who is there.... i told you its knock... knock who??? knock knock... WHO IS THERE!! OMG I TOLD YOU ITS KNOCK! KNOCK WHO!! WHO IS KNOCK! KNOCK KNOCK OMG WTF! HOLY SHIT WHO IS THERE! ITS KNOCK WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES! KNOCK WHO?? KNOCK KNOCK WHY DONT YOU REMEMBER ME! oh knock knock from next door! who is there???? jk.. knock...knock......omg put down the gun knock knock stop i love you knock its not worth it!! NO KNOC!!! GUNSHOT* KNOCK NOOOOO!!! I LOVED YOU SOMEONE CALL 911!! OMG KNOCK WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH KNOCK WHY!!!!

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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