Two guys stopped at a restaurant for coffee. "I'll have a mug of strong coffee," said the first. The second said, " I'll have strong coffee too, but I want a clean mug." The waiter returns and says, "which one of you wants the clean mug?"

What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Dr. I need a new butt, mine has a crack in it.

Why did the husband and wifes marriage fail? The husband slept with many other women and is putting his family through a hellacious situation.

What's brown and sticky? Shit.

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

Roses are red Violets are blue What about pansies

Q: What the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage

What did the duck say to the pickle? Quack

Why did billy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

Q: why are you gay A: because your physically attracted to the same sex

What is Dora the Explorer's favorite food? Pussy.

Irish sobriety

Nickelback.

Whats black, white, and read/red all over? What? Michael Jackson after his surgery.

how do you wake up lady gaga? poker face

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens don't have the cognitive capacity to reason. So you'd never know

Whats green and fuzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

Girl: I wanna get yo pants. Boy: but im wearing shorts.

There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

YOU

What did the priest do to the young catholic boy? Bless him.

your mama so jewish ( fat ) she had to take up two seats on the plane to fly here in the end there was no chocolate left she was taking up the whole plane space.

what did the African baby get for his birthday?..... AIDS

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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