roses are red violets are blue my dick is long longer then you

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A frog jumped on the lilly pad, it sank and drown and all of the tadpoles didn't have a mother and inevitably died

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. You honstly thought i would cry over you? Well guess what player, You just got played too!

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Knock Knock: I have full blown AIDS

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Why was the black man very rich? Because he was a lawyer who worked hard and was able to provide himself with a steady income.

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Two blonds walk into a building....they couldnt see it.

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What did the asshole say to his friend behind him? Fart

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What do you call the Doctor who graduated at the bottom of his class? Doctor.

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How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

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A woman walks into a bar.

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1 out of 4 questions. How do you get a girrafe in a fridge? Open it, put the girrafe in, and close it.

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Your momma's so fat that when she looked in the mirror she broke down crying and threw up in the toilet because she is belemic.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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The funniest thing about this joke is that by the time you realise it doesn't say anything its to late to stop reading it

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Why did the woman spend all her time in the kitchen? For fear of her abusive husband.

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a blond and a brunet jump of a bridge who hits the ground first ....... the brunet because the blond has to ask for directions

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What did they gay chicken say to the straight chicken? .... nothing, chickens dont speek.

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Why did the man die? because he hit his head and drowned

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What's black and white and red all over? A dying zebra.

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why didnt little timmy finish his test he was eaten by a muslim rhino... .

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What did one cat say to another? Cats cant talk

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A man walks into a bar and gets drunk. He then goes home and proceeds beating his many wives in a drunken fit of rage.

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96

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What do you do when you say shut up to someone and they say make me? Rip out their vocal cords.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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