Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

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What is colored and looks good hanging from trees? Oranges. Get your mind out of the gutter!

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What shakes and twitches and can be found at the sea bottom? A scuba diver running out of oxygen.

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There was a two car pile up at wal-mart. 50 mexicans were killed.

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What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My heart skipped a beat, I'm dead.

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What did the ghost say to the black man? nothing. He just shot him.

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How did little Tommy die? i pushed him into the deep end of the pool

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How do you stop someone from getting cancer? Kill them.

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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Evidently, in order to get any person of an object (most notably a swing) you must hit them with some form of large and/or sharp object.

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What’s funnier than cancer? Most things, really.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil armstrong Neil armstrong walks on the moon...Michael Jackson molests little boys

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what is the name of the book that helen keller wrote LADIUFgSLDGFhalkjgfvcgh

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old people are like slinkies...they arent really good for anything but brings a smile to ur face when they're pushed down the stairs...just think about it ;)

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Why couldn't the mentally retarded kid hear? It was too dark.

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If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

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What did the white man say to the group of mexicans when a golf ball was coming toward them? 4!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get mowed down by a tractor

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A door walks up with a knob what does the guy do? he opens the door

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why did the Mexican eat a octopus because he was hungry would die if he didn't

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Yo mama's so ugly, she has difficulty attracting a partner.

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What is white, sticky, and something that gay people and women love? Frosting.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops