A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The customers observing this quickly leave because the bartender is talking to a horse, which does not talk.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate flowers and am making fun of them by messing up this originally beautiful poem about those repulsive manisfestations of pure evil.

how do you make a janeter cry, you shit on the floor

You are such a loner nothing even clings to you, not even plastic wrap!!

Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

why doesnt cornelia say anything? she didnt answer

Q: Jeff has 10 cookies, He eats 9. Now what does he have? A: Diabetes, Jeff has diabetes.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

Why DIDN'T the skeleton cross the road? ..He didn't have any private parts

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

So - this baby seal walked into a club.

Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

Why did the cockroach cross the road? Why do you ask?

Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

Q: How many cows does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Infinite, cows do not have thumbs, in fact, they have hooves. This disables them from holding any large objects without the use of their mouthes.

Don't you hate the retarded smart people who think anti-jokes are all about really explaining but adding sarcasm? Yes.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have multiple personality disorder, NO YOU DON'T!

Question 1 - What is 1 + 1 = Hospital

What's funnier than 24? 25.

What's worse than pushing a baby off a cliff?........ Standing at the bottom with a pitchfork....!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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