Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

You know what's funny? You got AIDs

What did the jacket say to the girl? Zip me up wait why am I talking

What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

5 little monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "He has a mild concussion."

why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

*knock knock* "Who's there?" "It's the police, I'm afraid your husband was in a car crash and died."

What did one cow say to the other cow? Moo

how do people without arms and legs have sex? no one has sex with people without arms and legs.

What's black, white, and red all over? A pile of dead nuns.

A man in a wheelchair walked into a bar. No he didn't.

What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

What's the difference between shoes and babies? You can't eat shoes.

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

knock knok whos there? Jacob Jacob who? U know, your friend!

Why did stevie get stabbed in the jugular by his sister? He was telling bad anti jokes.

Exercise Ex - Er - Cise Ex - Ar - Size.. Eggs Are Sides For bacon.. BACON

what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

Why did the boy fall down the stairs? Because he tripped.

What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I actually take my shoes off when I jump on the trampoline.

Shaving your balls is just plain nuts!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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