Why don't you ever want to greet your friend Jack on the plane? Because your wife cheated on you with him and she is having his baby, if you were to even think about talking to Jack, you'd end up slitting his throat and throwing him off the side of the plane into a crocodile pit where they will make a feast of his body for the next couple days... So just don't greet Jack

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"Almost as accidental as your spelling I'm afraid." -...

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What do you call a white man who murdered his whole family? -a murder What do you call a black man who raped five women? -a rapest What do you call a Mexican with a leaf blower -a hardworking legal immigrant working twelve hours seven days a week to support his wife and three children.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because colonel sanders was chasing it with an axe

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how hungry am i? well im as hungry a starving kid in africa!!!!

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wouldnt it be ironic if chuck norris was shooting blanks

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Why did Jimmy fall of his tractor? Because Jimmy doesn't have any arms or legs...Why doesn't Jimmy have any arms and legs? Cause Jimmy is a potato.

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Roses are red, Bacon is also red. Poems are hard, Bacon.

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Q how do you feel? A with a series of nerve endings, that send signals to my brain

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I enjoy Popcorn

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What did the man do when he went in the bathroom he took a crap wiped his butt and washed his hands and went back to meet his family at the dinner table

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How do you confuse a Blondel? Tell her there's a demon in her liver

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What does DNA stand for? The National Association of Dislexics.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? The one at the bottom is alive. What's worse than that? He's eating his way out. What's worse than that? He came back for seconds.

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What do a turtle and a bowling ball have in common? Nothing

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Q:what has 6 legs and rides a unicycle! A: nothing!!! Duh!

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What do Miley and Bill Ray Cyrus have in common? Half their DNA

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A man walks into a bar, but it was a gay bar, and the man was a homosexual so he stayed and had fun then later that night he went home to his girlfriend

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whats chinese noodles

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Why did the Jew go to prison. He slaughtered his family.

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periods are red waffles are blue your mum's a milf I sucked her boob

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at its face.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he got hit by a fridge. Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she got hit by a fridge. Why couldn't the cat drink its milk? Because it had no face.

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Whats better than 1 person in your oven? 9 people in your oven.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops