A criminal walks into a bar, and shoots the bartender and has his way with the waitress. Its his bar now.

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What's worse than having to tie one of your shoelaces after walking 5 miles? Getting a 56 year old mixture of blood, urine and sperm injected in your asshole.

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You mama's so fat, that the doctor suggested that she go on a diet.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue...........Im wearing socks

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A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

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What is the difference between 10 dead babies and a 1,000,000 dollar car I don't have a 1,000,00 dollar car

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-I thought the lesson had started? -It has

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This is a joke.

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Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

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person 1:hello person 2:hello person 1:do you want to hear a joke ? person 2:yes person 1:good bye person 2:good bye

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i got 99 problems.... and aids is one

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What do you call a black baby? A nigglet

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A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

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What do you call a small chinese person? They prefer the term little person to the term midget.

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There is a black guy a white guy and a Mexican, whose driving. The other black guy.

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What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

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What's worse than an asian driver? A blindfolded asian driver.

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Logan's gay

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Why didn't the boy eat his soup? It was to hot.

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What did the joke say to the antijoke? Nothing.

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what do u call a black guys dick a pogo stick

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what did the n i g g e r with alzheimers say to the c h i n k? 9/11 was the funniest fake joke since the holocaust and 9/11 and the holocaust and 9/11... and... what?

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why did suzie fall off the swing? because she had no arms.. knock, knock who's there? not suzie

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A child walked into the bar. He was promptly asked to leave because he was too young.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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