"Hey want to hear the best knock-knock joke ever." "Sure." "Ok you start." "Knock-knock." "Whos there?" "..........."

thumb_up thumb_down +41

-Knock Knock - Who's there? - Child Protective Services, we have multiple reports of you abusing several of your children...

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did Kurt Cobain commit suicide? Because it was drug related

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did the astronaunt say to the doctor? Hola!

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Shaving your balls is just plain nuts!

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's white and red all over? A white guy who walked in the ghetto.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why wouldn't anyone want Helen Kellers dog? It's been buried for a long time...

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the strawberry say to the strawberry? Nothing because strawberries are fruit and can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the hat say to the scarf? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What is a frogs favorite drink? Water.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Two black guys walk into a bar the bartender says get out

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How many eskimos does it take to build an igloo? It depends... probably about six or seven.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Whats invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's the difference between your garage and mine? A pile of dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did Bert go to the doctor? He had an appointment.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did one alligator say to the other alligator? Ear

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Who has big muscles and is good at wrestling? A wrestler

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q: What's worse than getting a divorce? A: I don't know, i'm still married.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops