I named my cat Pounce because she jumps. In retrospect I suppose most cats do jump, in fact, they are even known for it.

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

A man is taking a shower in jail where he drops the soap. He proceeds to pick the soap up and cleans the rest of his body, puts his orange jumpsuit on and returns to his cell.

2

How do you starve a zombie? You dont, they are allready dead.

why was the little boy happy? Because he wasn't in the penn state locker room.

A Fat person walks out of mcDonalds

Yo momma so fat she ate a tape worm which had to be surgically removed because it further increased her health problems. She's still fat.

What did the bartender say to the fat guy? Hi

If roses weren't RED and violets weren't Blue... Walls are still solid objects.

Why did the black man have blood on his hands? He was a surgeon

What's worse than Patrick in a blender. Uuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, idk.

Do you want to hear a racist joke? I hate black people...

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't.

Q: What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the bat mobile? A: Robin get in the bat mobile.

Once i was walking down the street when i saw a homeless man As i leant to give him money he jumped up and stabbed me. Now i don't approach drunk strangers with hangovers

What is big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater.

What do you call a bear in an elevator?...A fire hazard.

A Jew, Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. They have fun there a good time and then they go home.

Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

a blind man walks into a wall

Q: What do you say when you see your T.V. floating at night? A: That's so frickin awesome

It's likely that very few people will read this.

High enough to know that fucking IQ is a terrible way to measure the total potential of the mind, which is potentially limitless depending on the person`s contact and control over the subconscious state.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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