A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter anyway because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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How do you get rid of Herpes? You can't.

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what did blonde say to the square? ur a square which is comprised of four equal sides and always have four lines of symmetry.

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this last joke was a correction to the other one

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a murderer.

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where did you get those clothes? at the toilet store.

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What do you call Helena… A Shady palm tree

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What did Delaware? A coat.

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a horse walks into a bar, hours later it walks out on two legs and the man who saw it all happen couldn't believe his eyes. The man then turns to the bartender and says, "I theenk eye've had enuf, Cut me hoff!"

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'll choke you with a hose

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What do you call a black prostetut with braces. A black and decker pecker wrecker

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Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

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Why was it cold in Florida on Monday? Because there was an irregular cold front moving through. The Monday part was just a coincidence.

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I took my blind grandmother to the art gallary

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a penguin biked to a bakery he walked in and asked for buns the baker said how many 12 or 13 the penguin said it don't matter I brought my bike

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Why couldn't the man get a job at the daycare? Because he was a serial killer/rapist.

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knock knock whos there i have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who Cream cheese

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas many gift card to stores he liked

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a supermarket... They buy food, put in their cars, drive home and cook dinner.

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Whats worse than being bored, Being you.

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What's white and black and lives in the ghetto : a panda bear

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In Soviet Russia you don't drive car, because the Soviet Union was disbanded in 1991

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Two guys walk into a bar.... OUCH

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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