What did the man say to his wife before she made him a sandwhich? Do your job and make me a sandwhich.

Brenda said she found a pill to stop the effects of aging! It was a cyanide pill, Brenda is dead.

My dog has no nose, how does it smell? Using its anus.

What do you do if you are surrounded by 2000 Hungry cannibals? You talk to them in a calm yet determined diplomatic voice, then you become a part of them. Moral: A part of them... Forever.

What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

Roses are red Violets are blue one plus one Equals two

what do u call a kid with autism? a autistic s.o.b or Hennon bart

Knock knock Who's there? You're You're who? YOU'RE MOM IN MY BED!!! (i know it sucks)

2

Everyone text/call Mrs. Butt Hemingworth for a free pint of her delicious marmalade! Serious inquirers only. 832 704 1331

Q: What happens when two planes both crush a tower in New York City? A: Bad news.

Why couldnt the girl ride her bike? becuase she was dreaming she actually doesnt have a bike her family is poor in these hard economic times.

Why don't vampires like garlic? Every vampires was raped by a garlic salesman.

What's the difference between a car tyre and 365 used condoms? One is a Goodyear. The others a fucking great year!!! San2

ur gey

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Why was the black person playing hockey? Because he found an interest to the sport during his childhood years.

Democracy.

Q: Why are the Black Eyed Peas named the Black Eyed Peas? A: I don't know ask them yourself.

What's short, ruthless, and asian? Kim Jong Ill

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? Using teamwork and coordination, each can place one foot on the seat of the stool, and using each other for balance and support, they can all stand on the stool. The fact that they are gay is irrelevant.

How many cavemen does it take to change a lightbulb? A caveman wouldn't know what to do with a lightbulb.

A hero is nice to everyone, but one person. who is that? Your mom. WOOOOOOOT!! YOU JUST GOT MUSCLEMANED!!!!

The Qur'an

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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