All these jokes are so much funnier when I read them during class, laughing my ass off and everybody's looking at me like I'm retarded

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What did the little girl buy for her cat? A box to bury him in.

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Why couldn't the pirate watch the violent movie? Because pirates died along time ago

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Roses are red Violets are blue i have a gun get in the van

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Tilt your screen back

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your mother is in alkatraz as she was sentenced to 25 to life due to false accusations

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What did the bartender say to the black guy? hi there

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why did the kid raise his hand in class because he had a question

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i am in sex mode, why the F**k are you!!

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LET'S PLAY CARDS SHUFFLE THE DECK *person with a deck-patio* no please don't

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A man walks into a bar and orders 10 shots of tequila. He later goes home drunk and beats his wife. His wife is getting a divorce.

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Jake snow steals ideas he doesn't make them up

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friend 1: Alright man, i got your back friend 2: AAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Knock knock. Who's there- oh wait, I don't care. Get away from my house or I am going to call the police.

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why was the girl raped? she left the kitchen.

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Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

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An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

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why did the chicken cross the road? does a chicken have to explain everything it does?? do u explain to everyone around you why you're crossing the road every time?! i think not!

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Why did the friendly not play outside? Because they were dead. Just like your dreams.

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what do you call 2 walking Arabs with long beards? pedestrians.

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What did the customer say to the waiter when he found a fly in his soup? Sorry to bother you on your break, but why didn't I get a fly in MY soup?

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The sentence at the bottom is true. The sentence at the top is false.

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What's worse than a paper cut? 2 paper cuts.

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What's the best time to go to the dentist? When your tooth breaks or you need braces.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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