How do you drown a dumb blonde? Hold her underwater.

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Hey babe, do you like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people? Because I like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people.

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It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave.

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A russian, a mexican, and an american are all sitting in a tavern. The russian ordered vodka, the mexican orders tequila, and the american orders a beer. When the waiter arrives, the russian throws his vodka into the air, shoots it, and says "we got too many of those in our country". The mexican tosses up his tequila and says "we got too many of those in our country". The american throws up his beer, shoots the mexican, and says "we got too many of those in our country". And then drinks his beer.

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ok there is 3 people and the white kid says "bet i got a better dick than all of you" he pulls it out and then the mexican says "nope got you beat" and then the black guy says "nope got all you beat look" and then the mexican and white guys say "its because your black" so the black guy goes home and tells his mom wht happen and ask " is it true mines bigger because im black?" she said " no it bc your 23"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111

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What is black and white and red all over? A multi-racial orphan who has recently suffered a fatal stab wound to a major artery.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The first is a person of the Jewish Faith and the other is a popular item of food.

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why do girls like grey's anatomy so much? because they are girls

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How do you spot a paedophile in a playground? You don't, there are usually a lot of adults around.

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Yo momma is so fat that she is at a high risk for heart disease and diabetes!

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Yo momma's so fat that her weight is completely disproportional to the average weight of someone her age.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she was born with no arms and is not loved.

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A boy walks into a bar. He wakes up in a hospital 3 days later with a bruise on his head. He asks the doctor, "What happened?" The doctor replies, "The bartender smashed a glass on your forehead."

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Why did jim all I over? He dies

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

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A Fat person walks out of mcDonalds

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your mom gave me head.....phones

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How many napkins does it take to tack to the moon? Purple, snakes don't have elbows

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A rapist leaps out a woman and yells "surprise!" and proceeds to have non-consensual intercourse with her. Later, he is arrested by the police and charged with sexual assault.

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A kid had wild unprotected sex. He didn't get an STD or enpregnate the girl.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Imaj. Imaj who? Haha, you're a Jew.

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Whats Worse then finding a worm in your apple. Finding a real joke on anti-joke.com

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Why did the guy in the wheelchair die? He was mauled by tigers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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