I was in the 74th hunger games I hid in the cornucopia until almost everyone was dead. Then I saw Katniss and Peeta so while they were distracted with night lock I pulled a rubber chicken out of my ass and beat the shit out of them till they died then I won the 75th hunger game also. They asked me to be there mocking jay but I killed them all and blew the plane up in the Capitol the end. By Adam Chebali

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How do you stop a lawn mower? You throw a baby under it.

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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what did nena say in the library while her and her friends were on anti-jokes? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy masterbating.

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what did the mexican do yesterday? bang your mom

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Roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry show me your tits!!

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Instructions to make origami. 1.) Staple bagels to face 2.) Ask someone else to do it. 3.) Hang yourself because you are too stupid to figure it out yourself

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

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why did your mum die young because she had canser

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whats the difference between a fur rug and a pile of dead babies? i dont lie on a fur rug to pleasure myself

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What happened when the boy fell off of the bridge? He died

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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None of the sex jokes are not funny or not funny. They're just inappropriate.

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what did the British horse say to the man who owned him? nothing all he sad was neigh.

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Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

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"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" Someone who needs to consider not saying "Knock Knock" every time they are about to enter a building.

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A midget and a jew walk into a bar. i forget the rest of the joke but your motheris a tramp.

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a mustang? I dont have a mustang in my garage.

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What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

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a gay man walks into a bar the bartender says "what'll it be today" he asks for a beer the bartender comes back with a beer because thats what he asked for.

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Diana- hey i havnt seen you all summer. Whaaat did you do over the summer? Paul- contract HIV Diana- ...oh ...

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Why did Jimy fell down the stairs, because he was adopted.

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I take the "the" out of Psychotherapist

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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