RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

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Did you hear about the peanut that was assaulted? He filed a police report weeks ago and is upset by the sluggish nature of the justice system.

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- Knock, knock. -- How many dead babies does it take to cross the street and walk into a bar? - That's an odd question to ask to a visitor. -- Your mom.

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Why did 3 kids mom's die last year? Because they were depressed and committed suicide.

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Whats fun about having sex with twenty six year olds? Theres twenty of them

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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Three Jews walked into a bar. I lied... it was a gas chamber.

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You know why they call me Scuba Steve? Because I Scuba Dive.

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There are two types of people in this world, those that can't count

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What did a Blond do in the Desert? She got lost after Falling of a flying carpet

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Why was Jenny alone? Everyone else had died in a zombie apocalypse.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead."

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What did the Ethiopian get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Yo mama so fat - - That your dad left her, and it's tearing your family apart

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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Your mom is so stupid she has trouble holding a steady job and struggles to support her family.

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What do you call white trash Garbage

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What's white and can't climb trees? Yogurt

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what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

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Hickory Dickory Dock. 2 mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one.. and the second one got away with major injuries, dying in a hospital three days later. The clock is now serving its 8th year in jail out of 25 years, and does not regret anything.

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What happened to the boy after his life saving surgery? He died of an unrelated disease.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Did you here about the Asian couple who had a stupid baby? They named him Sum Ting Wong

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Q: What do sleeping pills and coffee have in common? A: Absolutely nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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