This is an anti-anti joke. I don't expect him to get it.

your face

Q: What are 4 consecutive fart's called? A: Fart's, unless someone gives them names?

roses are red, windows are clear, get off your ass and bring me a beer

Reverse psychology never fails.

Q:Why is the WMBA so unsuccessful? A:Barely anyone watches it

1st guy:i like anti jokes. 2nd guy:me too, they make me laugh.

What do you get when you take a bag of chips and divide it by 5? a Nike store worker's meal

Alright alright... But you gotta promise to call me then

Why are anti jokes not funny.... Because they make sense.

Why did the baby bird have no friends? Because he chose not to socialize with the baby birds.

The Princess is in another castle

What did the UPS man bring Sara? a box. whats inside it is only Sara's buisness

You know what they say... Big feet Lawn-mower

roses are blue, violets are unicorns, this poem doesnt make any sense. refrigerator

A used condom filled with water and left on a radiator makes an ideal and inexpensive lava lamp.

A Muslim, a Buddhist, and a Christian are on a plain. They have to jump off for some reason. The Muslim straps a bomb to his chest, jumps out of the plain, and screams "AHLA AKBAH"!!!! The Buddhist jumps out and says save me heavenly Buddha. A giant golden hand catches him and lightly places him on land. The Christian says "aw hell with this" and jumps out, then says "save me heavenly Buddha". The giant golden hand places him down gently on land. The Christian then says "thank god". The giant golden hand comes back down and kills him.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had escaped from the farmer's field. The family were not too disheartened, as the rest were still contained.

Q: How do get a person to leave you alone ? A: Suck out his eye-balls stuff them in your ears to muffle the sound of his screaming as you head-butt him into a fine paste. Then proceed to spread or squeeze sed paste on to delicious food substance and eat sed delicious food substance. Then carry on with the rest of your day like nothing happened. (P.S. Just ignore any letters about court cases or arrests)

What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, water and sand are incapable of speech. Unless of course you are Harry Potter in which case you can cast a spell on them and turn them into a cat which still couldn't talk and them from there you could wait for them to evolve which doesn't actually exist so you would have to ask God and then you would wait for a few years than they could say hi.

How Do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door put the elephant in and close the door. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door take the elephant out put the giraffe in and close the door. The lion king has a meeting with all the animals but one doesn't turn up, which one is it? The giraffe because it's still in the fridge.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes now you do too.

God made Coke God made Pepsi God made me, Oh so sexy

Doctor Doctor, I keep getting horrible boils all over my face! Okay then. Take off your underwear and we'll see what's going on.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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