Why did the blond woman sell her water skis? She was in a horrible accident and will never walk again.

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What word starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? Fuck.

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What would George Washington be doing if he was alive today? Scratching and screaming at the bottom of his coffin.

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What's the difference between a bag full of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

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Man walks into a hotel on Friday, Stays for three days and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? A. His horses name was Friday

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What do you get if you cross a river with a cat? Wet.

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Why was the curious black guy a good Lumberjack? He was always axin'.

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What did one homo-sexual say to his four homo-sexual friends? Were One Direction!!

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How did the baby cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken

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Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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i killed a blind guy when he wasnt looking

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Terry has ebola

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-Ask me if I'm a tree. +Are you a tree? -Yes. -Ask me if I'm an orange. +Are you an orange? -No, I'm a tree, were you listening me?

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Why did the girl fall off of her highchair? Her father threw an axe at her.

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What has seven ears, four legs and two arms? Nothing.

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why did the black guy die? cancer

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chuck norris was shot yesterday... tomorrow is the bullets funeral.

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why did the car go to the bathroom? it had gas.

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Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

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What's a Democrat's favorite activity? Blaming Republicans for shit they didn't do.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Keep talking shit bitch, and I'll come for you!

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He didn't give in to peer pressure.

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What do you call someone who puts one number on here as a joke? Someone with no life.

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why couldn't jonny ride on a swing? he had no arms or legs why didn't jonny have any arms or legs? he's a potato!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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