a jew walked into a bar-mitzvah

What's the difference between a black man and a couch? One is a human being and one is a piece of furniture.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

what did nena say in the library while her and her friends were on anti-jokes? I don't know. I wasn't there.

a group of teenagers are laughing at a boy around their age when on says "youre stupid" the boy then replies "i prefer the term Autistic"

what happened when 3 had sex with 4? nothing numbers are not capable of sexual intercourse

Text this number just cuz 16305208722

Roses are red, Violets are blue Oh, that's good to know.

What's worse than being a Jew in the Holocaust? Nothing.

Sex

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I´ll give anything to be screw by you.

A Mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? The black man, because he was the designated driver for the night and was being helped by his good friend, Paco the Mexican, to quit his alcohol addiction. The AA meetings and rehab clininc were failing and he had lost his job. Jamaal, the black man, is now attending night school and holding down a part-time job at his local Baha Fresh. paco is very proud of him.

What is black and white and red all over? A nun that just fell down the stairs.

Q:What's red and crawls up your leg? A: A homesick abortion

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? i lost my tractor

Why didn't the boy come out of the closet? He had no legs.

My daughter's so smart, that instead of texting K, she writes Potassium.

What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

A sheep croses the road It gets hit by a car.

Eeny meeny miny mo, Catch a tiger by it's toe, If he hollers let him go, Because if you don't he would attack you and go straight for you're neck and you would die a painful death...

What has two legs and two arms? A Human

What did the potato say to the man It said nothing it is a potato

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...