Knock knock. Who's there? Gestapo. Gestapo who? Your husband is dead.

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Why did the man die in a car crash? Answer: He was not fallowing the traffic laws and therefore risking the life of himself and others. This may have resulted from the possibility that he was under the influence of alcohol, he was under the influence of drugs, he was emotionally unstable from a bread up, he was emotionally unstable from because of an abusive family, he was emotionally unstable from losing his job, he had an abusive childhood, he was emotionally impaired, he was high from lack of oxygen, he wanted to wear a blindfold, he didn't like his car, liked to spin the steering wheel a lot, he thought the gas was the break, or he just didn't like traffic laws.

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Moderately entertaining story, friend.

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Listen, I cannot as much as I would like, to take the full responsibility for every decision my former followers might decide to make of their own, we are no religion nor do we follow any kind of doctrines, we encourage freedom but also respect for our fellow human beings, all of them regardless of race or affiliation. But you let me know whoever has as much as looked at you the wrong way, and I will make sure they no longer find themselves welcome within my order, nor anywhere else if their actions merit the firm hands of justice.

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Two black guys run into a bank with guns. They place them in their pre-payed safety deposit boxes and continue on their way as they were falling behind on their schedule.

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WANNA HERE A JOKE? (no, i purposely clicked in this joke website to simply here to fulfill my demonic internet pleasures.)

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I had a lemon. hi.

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What did Stevie Wonders wife do when they got into fights? Re-Arrange the furniture

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine

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PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN cil you have such a dirty mind

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Their was three black men that walked into a bar. They then ordered three drinks and had sex... I lied about walking into a bar

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whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead black guy on the road? there is skid marks leading up to the dog.

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Female rights.

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What do you get when you rape a dead baby filled with jalapeños? A lifetime in prison, and a burning penis.

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nobody move! I've dropped my brain.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in an oven.

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what sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? a baby combing its hair with a potato peeler

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How many Poles does it take to change a lightbulb? Just the one, usually.

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Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body in an accident? He bled to death.

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whats worse than someone blowing out all your birthday candles? a piano dropping on your head.

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What do you call a mother who is also your aunt and a father who is also your uncle? Incest

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Lil Wayne's rapping career

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Why did Bob throw butter out the window, Because he is mentally retarded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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