Okay, but cut me some slack here, its not as straight forward as it sounds, I got at least twice as many active synapses as other people do, that means twice the thought process, in video games I can for example remember twice the commands, and such. Sadly this does not mean that I can think twice as fast or twice as smart, but rather that I do so involuntarily in short spans, until I burn myself out. So be a bit nice to me, when I say that I have since I was a kid used about 2.5-7.5 mg valium, this is just because my thought process works so fast I burn out because well, I got the processor, but it burns out, excuse me my wife needs some help with her cellphone, see you soon

Math teacher: I have 5 bottles in one hand, and 6 in the other. What do I have? Student: A drinking problem. _._._

How do you stop your child from picking his nose? Cut his hands off

Why didn't the Baby wake up? Because it was dead

This is a haiku A lovely type of poem It's snowing on Mt. Fuji

What's the difference between a ginger and a brick? Bricks get laid

why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

What do you call 10 Asians playing basketball? A group of friends hanging out and having a good time.

Why did the Mexican jump the fence? Because he didn't feel like walking around the house to the side where the gate was to get out of the backyard

How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her.

Why does it take longer to build a Blonde snowman as opposed to a regular one? The trip to find a blonde wig suitable for a snowman, especially if you are picky and have a certain wig in mind, generally takes up more time than not searching for a wig at all.

A blindman walks into a bar... then a chair, then a pole

What's the quickest way to a man's heart? A knife.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders house?. No, Well neither has he...

Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears? Because he's a rabbit

Roses are red, Sometimes they're white. Or pink. Or yellow. There are roses of many colors.

whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb. One

Why didnt santa leave presents under the tree? Because santa doesnt exist.

*knock knock* "Who's there?" "It's the police, I'm afraid your husband was in a car crash and died."

Gay's

whats a diffrence between a bench and a black person the bench is a thing a black person is a human being

Q: How do you confuse more than 80% of the population? A: Mushrooms.

What's red, hairy, and squishy? Helen Keller in a blender.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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