- Anti Joke

A little blind girl goes up to her mum and says, "Mummy, mummy, when will I be able to see?" Her mum replies "I'll tell you what, I'll take you to the chemist and get you some special cream for your eyes and you will be able to see in the morning." So off they went to the chemist, got the cream, and went home, all the while the little girl was getting more and more excited at the prospect of being able to see again. Once they got home, the mother put the cream on the little girls eyes, wrapped a bandage around her head, and took her to bed. The following morning the little girl stumbled into her mums bedroom and excitedly shouted "Quick mummy, take off the bandage so that i will be able to see again." So the mother slowly took of all the bandages, taking her time, and all the while the little girl was getting more and more excited. Once they were off the little girl said "But mummy, I still can't see." To which the mother replied, "April fool!"

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? lts of stuff like murder, rape, slavery, poverty, mindcontrol, mass genocide, the holocaust, racism, plagarism, physichal assault, war, terrorism, massacres, onsloughts, necrophillia, the dead rising, zombies, jokes on antijokes.com, awkward situations, dieing, cancer, ADHD, other mental illnesses, paint, the grim reaper, shinigami, stereotyping foreigners, prejudicism, bullying, armed robbery, hacking, viruses, incest, feral animals, getting lost in the forest, arsonry, pyromania, passing out in a bar, meeting a serial killer, and finding 2 worms in your apple.

Two men walk into a bar...They are traveling together for a convention and like pub type bars and are excited to be there.

Two nineteenth century men walk into a bar. Their wives didn't complain, because if they did they'd get hit. hard.

What is the meaning of life? Definitions of life on the Web: a characteristic state or mode of living; "social life"; "city life"; "real life" the experience of being alive; the course of human events and activities; "he could no longer cope with the complexities of life" the course of existence of an individual; the actions and events that occur in living; "he hoped for a new life in Australia"; "he wanted to live his own life without interference from others" animation: the condition of living or the state of being alive; "while there's life there's hope"; "life depends on many chemical and physical processes" the period during which something is functional (as between birth and death); "the battery had a short life"; "he lived a long and happy life" the period between birth and the present time; "I have known him all his life" the period from the present until death; "he appointed himself emperor for life" a living person; "his heroism saved a life" liveliness: animation and energy in action or expression; "it was a heavy play and the actors tried in vain to give life to it" living things collectively; "the oceans are teeming with life" the organic phenomenon that distinguishes living organisms from nonliving ones; "there is no life on the moon" biography: an account of the series of events making up a person's life a motive for living; "pottery was his life" life sentence: a prison term lasting as long as the prisoner lives; "he got life for killing the guard"

this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

Caca.

Why did Rosie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus...

Chris Bosh's neck

Jimmy's mom: Jimmy go do your chores now!! Jimmy: You shut your mouth, whore. Get your smelly ass back in the kitchen!!!

Three gay men are in a bath tub and bubbles come up and one says "who farted?"

whats worse than finding a worm in your penis having your wife bite of your penis and die from an infecction

Knock, Knock Who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill your neighbor. Can I have some flour?

What did one cat say to the other cat? Meow. What did one dog say to the other dog? Meow. Why was the man sad? He had a retarded dog.

Q: How did the woman die in the black neighborhood? A: She suffered a fatal heart attack while visiting one of her friends. Everyone mourned their loss.

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

whats wrose than slipping on a banana? Getting Shot in the face.

Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

What did the man with sores on his tounge get for a birthday present? He recieved a very nice pair of trousers which he wore to work from time to time

Death by kayak

What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

A can walks into a bar...HAHAHAHA JK LOL thats not possible! What was I thinking? Silly me! -David Bruggen

This is a joke.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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