What's grey and can't swim? A Castle

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are also red, "Honey, please call the fire department!"

A black guy and a mexican guy are falling from a building. Which one hits the ground first? Who cares

An insane individual walks into a bank and asks for $500. The teller refuses since he doesn't have an account, so the individual pulls out a gun and asks the teller again. The teller presses the silent panic button, causing the cops to show up and arrest the gunman, but not before he manages to shoot the teller and the small child standing next two counters over.

a guy walks into the bedroom with a duck in his arms, his wife is in bed half nakid. he then coments out loud this is the pig im f**king. his wife says huny your holding a duck. then he with a serious look on his face says im sory i wasent talking to you

A young penguin walks into a bar with tears streaming down his face. "Whats wrong with you?" asks the barman. "I've lost my Dad", says the Penguin. The barman asks, "What's he look like?"

Q. Why cant Stephen Hawking walk into a bar? A. Because he suffered being paralyzed and is unable to walk. So theoretically speaking it is impossible to walk when paralyzed and in a wheelchair unless the victim is out of his or her wheelchair. Please note that the chances of walking when paralyzed are extremely slim.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was blind.

If you are reading this you are a nerd

A: Knock Knock! B: RING THE DOORBELL YA DUMMY

What's the difference between a guy who sees the glass half empty and a guy who sees the glass half full? The first guy is happier because his tables tip more than the second guy's.

What happened when the blackman saw the white man. they both said hello

What's the difference between tiger woods and Santa clause? Tiger woods is a thug

Q: There's a Brit, Kenyan, German, and Colombian in one room. Where are they? A: Public School

why did hellen kellers dog run away? because if your name was awughunguh you'd run too.

Immigration Laws

Why does Miley Cyrus make sex tapes It's the only acting job she can get

The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

A rabbai , a mexican , and a ginger are In a car going over a cliff. Which one dies? Who cares?

Why did the leaf fall off the tree? Because it was Fall.

Life is like a bucket of wood shavings. Except when they're in a pail. Then it's like a pail of wood shavings.

how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? open the door and put him in.

What's black and white and red all over? A domestically abused bi-racial woman.

What do you call black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist bastard

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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