OK, Billy went to his friend Fred in the tree. And then went inside to get a snack. Then Fred fell out of the Tree and.....landed on a comfy mattress.

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Have you heard about the Polish princess? There isn't one. The Polish monarchy was abolished in 1918.

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knock knock whos there haha this is a shit joke anyone that reads this is a jimmy saville follower and got fingered up the bum hole violently by him love you

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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb? NONE A YO F******G BUSINESS!!!

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What did one fetus say to they other fetus? Nothing they were aborted.

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when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. when life gives you melons, you are soon diagnosed with dyslexia.

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Why did the woman cross the road? Trick question, she didn't because she was in the kitchen.

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What's the only animal that has to be oiled? any animal I can think of

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Q: What's the best way to eat lasagna A: With a fork, although a spoon is a fine substitute

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A man walked into a bar. He got drunk and left.

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What's funnier than an anti-joke? Sarcasm.

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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Wigan.

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Why did the polar bear die? Global warming.

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What did the American WWII soldier say to the Feudal-era samurai? Nothing, because the two lived on completely different continents and in completely different time periods.

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hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

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what did the little boy say to the man? Nothing because earlier that day his mom reminded him not to talk to strangers

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the slaughterhouse was on the other side.

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What do you call a black man throwing jars of flaming fruit preserves at a Jewish basketball player. MEXICO

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Knock Knock Who's there? Xiao Kaan Xiao kaan who? Fu*k you ugly lauuhhh

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Knock knock Who's there? Hi would you be interested in learning about Scientology? No

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Hey i heard You were a wierd kid ooooooooooalskdfjaslkdfj

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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