Q:What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped by a giant scorpion

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is a haiku? Are they hard to come up with? Obviously not.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

your momma eats so much ice cream, you often find yourself without anything sweet to eat late at night when you're hungry

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man is jogging down the street. He bangs his kneecap into a metal pole and shatters it. He is then hit by a giant cheese wheel and dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did Batman tell Robin before he got into the Batmobile? "Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Patient: I thonk I'm gonna die Doctor: well will ya hurry up and die already? I've got to treat a kid with a paper cut.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's the difference between a black guy and an asian. They come from different race groups.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Not Suzy!!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was the dog fallowing the fat guy. The fat guy said come.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I came to the bar at 7:00. What time did I leave at? There was no clock at the bar I went to, therefore i cannot determine when I left or when I cmae, so my above opinion is clearly incorrect.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

it's easy to take part, just type your text below!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many apples come from trees? None, not a single one of em'

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it does whatever the hell it wants to do!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

a man dyslexic into bar walks a

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man walks in front of a bus. The bus driver avoids the man but hits the boy eating ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man said lol, I said lol back. Then he started to beat me up for repeating his phrase!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the little girl drop her balloon? Because she was getting raped in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why wasn't 7 afraid of 6? Numbers are numbers and therefore incapable of feeling any emotion.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What would Steve Jobs be doing if he were alive today? Dying.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what goes boo a sock

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What happened to the Chicken who crossed the road? It made it to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops