Q: Holy do you get a nun pregnant? A: You have sexual intercourse with her, and have an orgasm inside her body. Also, in vitro fertilization is a viable, albeit expensive, alternative for couples who have difficulty conceiving by standard intercourse.

Why couldn't the boy write his name because he had no arms.

What do you call a Simon with no arms and legs? Simon

what did one dog say to his sex partner? woof woof

a chinese man pays the full price

A guy walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out because he is only 19 years old.

Timmy had to use the restroom in class one day, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I use the restroom?" The teacher said, "I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said'," When I was using 'can', I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier for asking for permission, as opposed to expressing ability. I though since you were a teacher you would know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

Whats Funnier than the Holacaust? A: Nothing you asshole!

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

Your mommas so fat she jumped into the ocean and immediately had to start swimming.

What happens when your school teacher gives you homework over the break? You give your teacher homework too!

What do u call a man who is smart. A lawyer/ genius/ smart man

What do you get on anti-jokes.com? A bunch of repeated "jokes", that don't make any sense.

Your mum is so fat, she is likely to do die before my mum.

How do you kill Glenn Campbell? Stab him with a screwdriver.

Dude, that's not banana ice cream...

How do u kill a horse? U stab it with a huge butcher knife

How do you attach a nipple tassle to a purple honey badger? Refridgerator

What do you call a black man throwing jars of flaming fruit preserves at a Jewish basketball player. MEXICO

What is Worst than having a cancer ? Having two cancer

Knock-Knock Whos there? You You who? Yoohoo! is anybody home?!! Well obviously or i wouldn't have talked to you. Idiots these days!

I like my women like I like my coffee.......... I don't like coffee

Why couldnt the man find his wallet? He didnt have one

Ich bin nicht der Anführer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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