I put children on a leash and store them under my bed. I feed them bird food and they drink eachothers urine.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

yo mama is so fat that a kid said to her ' The White Buddha Has Returned'

thumb_up thumb_down +3

The body system was looking for a leader!? Heart - I am because I circulate the blood Brain - I should be because I control the body Liver - I should because I feed Anus - No, I am All laugh The anus held closed for seven days. The liver exploded the brain stewed and the heart stopped beating. Anus - Now, what am I?!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Who is best known for causing the Mt. St. Helens Eruption, The World Series Earthquake, and The Asian Tsunami in 2004? According to insurance companies, God.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

So I'm blowing this guy and he starts rubbing his finger through my hair... So I started thinking, what a fag.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Caroline Kelly.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

If you dont see banners here it does mean they are not here. P.S Advertising helps fill our pockets and annoy you. Please be understanding in the fact that we will permaban you while grinning if you refuse to UNDER-stand our rule.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the dead man say? Nothing because dead human beings have no beating heart and do not live so they cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: What did bulbasoar say to charmander? A: Bet ya thought I was gunna say Bulbasoar!!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Doctor, doctor, I have a cavity! Go to the dentist.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

The sentence at the bottom is true. The sentence at the top is false.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A program that creates "pointless inventions" and posts them at the wrong sections.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How does Batman's mother call him to dinner? She doesn't, she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's white and sticky? Snow. What were you thinking of?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

If I were in a room with you hitler, stalin, i would shoot hitler and stalin because they are horrible people.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

The Morman Religion.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's brown and sticky? A Mexicans underwear.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the strawberry say to the grape? Nothing, inanimate objects can't use verbal communication.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a black man eating dessert? A man of African ancestry enjoying a sweet treat.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I don't know which one is emptier my bank account or my love life

thumb_up thumb_down +3

how does a chinese chick check if she's pregnant? swallows a rubix cube and if it comes out solved shes pregnant

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Three Lawyers are walking, one falls down, gets up and continues walking

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops