Why did the mailman say hi to you? He was trying to be friendly

Why did Timmy fall off his swing? The Holocaust

Its Eliza, hope you are still there, would you mind getting here sooner? This site is not safe, besides its cold here, I mean send somebody else if you got to, I might look frail but Nero taught me a thing or two, so I can honestly say that Nero taught me better than you guys just in case. Funny you say there is no code, yet add three, yeah you better expect nothing "fancy", Mr.Torture dungeon master. Honestly though I do not blame you, and if I really meant you where a psycho, I would not have agreed/asked you showed up, I am serious I need to get out of here.

What do you call a woman when you're inside her? Mom.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She didn't own a car.

What did the arsonist shout out in the movie theater? Nothing. He set the exits ablaze and said absolutely nothing.

Knock Knock. Who`s there? Hadooouuuuuuu! Hadou who? KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN! PERFECT!!! Perfect Bonus: 38493483948394839483984 Skill 0000000 Your life 0 Bonus 9001

What's black and dangerous? A fridge, I lied about the black part.

I like food. But what's more than that it is necessary for survival. ASIAN!!!!

A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

your a vagina says you, you're a tit

Try it Yourself »

Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought that the second one would have seen it.

a boy jumps through a mirror and out a window then he fell so now he's dead.

What did Facebook say to Twitter, and twitter to blogg ant blogg to youtube? nothing. They cant talk..

you cant spell slaughter withought laughter

What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

Patrick: My name is 24. Spongebob: Hey, Patrick, you know whats worse than 24? Patrick: What? Spongebob: 911.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office, naked but wrapped in Saran Wrap. The Doctor takes one look at him and says, "I can clearly see your nuts."

How do you make a Child cry? Slaughter his dog and feed it to him convincing him its Chili

Maths.

" Whats the deal with airline food? " -Sharon

why couldnt helen keller drive she was a woman

Why did the monkey eat the pineapple? IDK, ask Sam D

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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