Little Jack Horner sat in a corner, Dead.

Roses are red Violets are? blue Lets eat poo I know you want to

It is better to have loved and lost, Than to have fallen, bleeding, into shark-infested waters.

How many licks did it take for the owl to get to the center of the tootsie roll tootsie pop? A: Since when did owls have tounges?

What is worse than blue balls? Green Balls.

When does the ice cream get thrown at the yellow horse on thursday evening? Purple Monkey Rainbow

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have ADD Check out this flashlight!

What did the three best friends say to eachother? We are all best friends

why couldn't the man play frisbee? he was a dog

What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

Man: Why do you wear your wedding ring on the wrong finger? Woman: Oh, wow, thanks for pointing that out. Silly me.

haha

What looks like half of an apple? The other half.

haha your power hose was robbed and the shitty bike

Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of it's legs.

What is worse than finding a real joke on Anti-joke.com? Starving children in Africa.

Listen, I cannot as much as I would like, to take the full responsibility for every decision my former followers might decide to make of their own, we are no religion nor do we follow any kind of doctrines, we encourage freedom but also respect for our fellow human beings, all of them regardless of race or affiliation. But you let me know whoever has as much as looked at you the wrong way, and I will make sure they no longer find themselves welcome within my order, nor anywhere else if their actions merit the firm hands of justice.

Two pretzels were walking down the street when one got assaulted...

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? Quite obviously, still quizzical, being that tests are just longer, harder quizzes.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He has no legs.

what is green and smells bad? an orange dolphin that poops out rainbows.

who is not good looking? mon morello

If you were on an island with one wish what would you wish for? To get off the island

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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