Why is it wrong to love your neighbour? You would be loving a dickhead.

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A couple is playing chess. The man then chokes his wife to death, throws her body in a woodchopper, and eats her like cereal- Frost

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What do you call Ed Milliband after he's been decapitated? Dead Milliband.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Stab her.

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Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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A guy walks into a bar. No one notices he has epilepsy.

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Knock knock whos there Ewan Gudgeon *Shoots Himself cause cannot live with hearing tht name*

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A man walks into a pole and says "I know, this pun is lame"

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A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

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- What's better than just sitting on a couch in a summerhouse with a bottle of wine and reading a good book? - An orgy.

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what do you call a man with a bullet hole in his leg? A man who needs t see a doctor.

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Hi! Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Roughly 1150 pounds if a full grow male.

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Why is bobsledding the coolest sport? Because this is my subjective opinion.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The other color on our flag is white I'm an American and rhyming doesn't matter

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why was the toddler sad? he was diagnosed with cancer after his dog was put down because it raped and murdered his parents

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Why did the horse go to the doctor? It had a heart disease.

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Two fish are sitting in a tank. One says, "I'll man the guns. You drive."

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Why didn't little Billy's parents get him the new toy he wanted? Little Billy's parents are dead.

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A man was complaining about not getting enough sleep. He was then raped.

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Roses Are Red I Have A Phone Nobody Txts Me Forever Alone

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What did the black man buy at the fruit shop? Some bananas.

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"I had angry birds before it was cool." -Alfred Hitchcock

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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