How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

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What's faker than Nicki Minaj's tits? Women rights.

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What does a chocolate bar and a dolphin have in common? Nothing

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it does whatever the hell it wants to do!

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why didn't the chicken cross the road... because it got hit by a truck

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where did you get those clothes? at the toilet store.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We can never be truly sure of the chicken's real purpose, but given the circumstances of the surroundings, the story has it that the purpose of the chicken was to physically move to the other side of said road.

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Chris:"knock, knock" Rhianna:"owwww..." Chris:"open da door" Rhianna:"so u can punch me in the face" Chris:"duhhh, I jus got brass knuckles"

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What's the difference between a black man and a park seat? A park seat can support a family

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Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.

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How many Bedouins do you need to change a light bulb? 2, one is changing the bulb and the second is powering the generator.

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Why does Eric Clapton use a Mac? Because he prefers Macs.

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What do fat kids and whales have in common? Ruth burden

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All these jokes are very entertaining, but if you look closely, Lebron clearly travels. Wheres the call ref what the hell.

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did you know hellen keller had a dog? niether did she

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side

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The man and the women were doing something. What are you looking? They just talked

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Knock knock Who's there A gorilla A gorilla who? A gorilla is a ground-dwelling, predominantly herbivorous ape that inhabit the forests of central Africa. The eponymous genus Gorilla is divided into two species: the eastern gorillas and the western gorillas, and either four or five subspecies. They are the largest living primates by physical size. The DNA of gorillas is highly similar to that of humans, from 95–99% depending on what is counted, and they are the next closest living relatives to humans after the chimpanzees and bonobos.

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What do you do if a bird shuts on your windscreen? A:never take her out again.

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what's worse then the holocaust finding a worm in your apple.

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Skinny guy: Hey wanna hear a yo mama joke? Fat mother: Hey you wanna die?

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Every time a bell rings an angel gets it's wings. What they don't tell you is every time a mouse trap snaps an angel gets set on fire.

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Why did the man walk up to a bank teller with a gun? He is the security guard; he wanted to ask her for financial advice.

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Ask me if I'm a tree..... "are you a tree?" No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops