How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? None, you don't have to be jewish to change a light bulb

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had just received a call from his family, hearing that his father had just been butchered. He was approaching the farm when an 18-wheeler approached. The tire flew off, hit a candy store, candy flew in the chicken's mouth, and it died of diabetes. However, right before the chicken died he finally crossed the road, not knowing he would get shot by his farmer. The chicken managed to survive the shooting to his right kidney, wiggled to his family, and died in front of his wife.

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James' father died from being overweight. The next day in the mail, James received a coupon for Skinny's garcinia cambogia pills to help him lost weight. Simply put, it was not a good day for James.

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I saw a woman get burned alive on the news... That woman was my mom.

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What do you call a redneck virgin? A seven year old who can run faster than her brothers.

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why did the shark bite the surf board? It thought it was turtle.

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How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

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Why was the woman crying? Because I hit her with a bat.

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You think I'm pretty without any makeup boy..... Let's bang.

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Little Jack Horner sat in a corner, Dead.

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Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9 8 7

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Roses are red Violets are? blue Lets eat poo I know you want to

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Q:whats the difference between a black man and a bunk bed A: a bunk bed can support 2 kids

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Whats funnier then a dead baby? A lot of things.

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Q. How did the blind man cross the road A. By an abmulance which took him to the hospital because his first attempt to cross was unsuccessful and the hospital was conventeintly located on the other side of the road.

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Who the heck do you think you are?! Ally...duh

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whats black white and red all over an abused child

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did Jonny commit suicide? Airplanes dont have feet.

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Justin Beiber walks into a bar. The bartender does not serve him because he is not the legal drinking age yet.

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Whats the difference between cats and dogs? ....cats suck

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Two latino men are drinking at a bar. Suddenly, one man falls off his barstool, unconscious. Later that day, he was diagnosed with pancreatitis, and died never having dealt with his severe alcoholism.

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at rhymming you have nice boobs

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Friends are like snowflakes, they go away when you pee on them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops