So, a Bobcat walks into a bar. A few moments later, the bar was empty, save a bobcat and two critically wounded men.

A bar walks into Chuck Norris.

What do you call it when an Arabic man gets shot? Murder.

A man rode into town on Friday and came out on Friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a couple of hours

What did the Rabbit say to the horse? They are both completly differebt species and cannot communicate. Therefore, the rabbit said nothing.

Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

Q #1: Why did Sally fall off the swings? A #1: She has no arms. Q #2: Knock Knock Who's There? Not Sally.

roses are red violets are blue i'm a schizophrenic and so am i

BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

Irish sobriety

Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! That's a rather strange psychological problem I think you should consult a professional psychologist rather than see me.

Ebola

What did the blonde do when she reached the traffic lights? She stopped, as the lights were red.

Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

Why did Kelsey run out of eggs? Horses don't have much sperm.

Why did Timmy's face hurt? Because there was a frog stapled to it.

knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... Your mom's a wh0re.

What did the Elephant say the other Elephant? We do not know. Their vocalization is still a mystery to us.

Roses are red, but there are also pink, white and yellow varieties Violets aren't blue, they're violet, hence the name I've got OCD And my poetry skills are also lacking.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

How does an elephant climb a cliff who cares

An Irishman, a German, a Jew, and a Mexican walk into a bar...... the Irishman is named designated driver and all four have a safe and enjoyable evening.

What do you can a stinky mexican? Whatevet his name may be. Possibly Jose

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...