Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought is was yours.

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Your mother is so fat, she appeals to my secret fetish.

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What did one Platypus say to the other Platypus? Nothing, Platypuses can't talk. However, they are the only mammal to lay eggs.

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what does a baby with no lims get for christmas...cancer

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There once was a man from Duluth who's never did rhyme. They were often too short.

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A middle aged man goes to a psychic. She tells him that he has prostate cancer, and his wife has been cheating on him for the past 3 years.

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Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

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Roses are green violets are brown wait a minute..........my shoes untied

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why does clive keep getting crunk? because no girl satisfies him as much as geros

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A man got struck by a car and was rushed to hospital on life support, he died shortly after. His wife was informed of his death by the doctors and shortly after she killed her children and finally hung herself.

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whats worse than a chicken crossing the road 10 dead babies in a bucket

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Knock knock. Who's there? Docter. Docter who? XDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

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Did you hear about the monkey in the tree? Oh no wait. It was a lizard.

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Q. Why was the black man sad? A. He had a book nailed into is leg.

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Have you seen the blind man's new house? No. Neither has he.

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If you throw a red stone in a blue lake what does it become? Simply a wet stone.

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what do you call a baby with no arms and no legs in a mailbox? a horriffic murder

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K O O K A B U R R A . . . . . . . . . . ReTweet

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Why couldn't the blonde get pregnant? Because she was dead, and her reproductive organs had stopped functioning.

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Why didn't john go to school? He has terminal cancer and he must stay at hospital

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What did the snowman put on his head? Nothing; snowmen are inanimate.

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Q. Why did the 40 year old woman puts on a large amount of makeup? A. She may have gerontophobia.

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Why did David go swimming? Pink sock.

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Sickman Fraud, cocaine snorting alshole... "Oh yeah mommy I love raping you so much... What where are you? This cocaine is really bad quality man! The effect was so short..." Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: "Because since when do you really need cocaine... ...In order to rape your mother?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops