what did sushi A say to sushi B? Nothing, because sushi is composed of aboitic fish, rice and other nutritious components and cannot speak

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what did the blind man see? Nothing he felt the penis in his butt.

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What do you call a woman with one leg? I don't know. I am not in the position, currently, of knowing anyone who finds themselves in such an unfortunate condition.

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he saw his ex-girlfriend walking down the street so he was trying to kill her by hitting her in the head with the clock.

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Q:What did the frog say to the mailman? A:Nothing theres no mail on Sunday's.

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A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

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yesterday, a girl asked me why a guy is Bro if he bangs alot of chicks, and chicks are hoes if they do alot of guys. i said to her “well, if one key can open a lot of locks, then it is the master key. if a lock can be opened by alot of keys, then it’s a shittyass lock, isn’t it

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Guess what day it is!!! Sunday? Monday? Tuesday? Wednesday? Thursday? Friday? Saturday? IT'S HUMPDAY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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There was 3 Men. Who had crashed their car on there way back from the Bar, All 3 of them died. Once they got to heaven, Jesus told him " The better in life you were with relationships,and staying true with one love- The better Transportation you get." Guy one got a Scooter. Guy two got a bike. And Guy 3 got a Mustang. One day, Guy 1 and 2 were on their bike and scooter. And they see Guy 3 upset. "Whats wrong? You got the best transporation in heaven!!" Guy 3 looks up at guy 1 and 2, Then says " I know I do..... But, I just seen my wife on a Skateboard."

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What did the apple say to the other apple? Nothing, apples are fruits and cannot talk

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

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There was a man driving his truck down a dark road, half way down the road he see's a man walking alone. He stops beside him, winds down his window and says "Oi mate, need a lift"? The man replies "yeah sure, but can i sleep in the back of the truck"? The driver replies "Yeah sure" later on as the man is sleeping he hears a big bang. "what was that" the man asks. The driver says "Don't worry i just hit a cow, go back to sleep". time goes by and he hears another bang. "W-what was that". "Don't worry i just hit a moose, go back to sleep and ill wake you when we arrive". Few moments latter he hears a tick tick bang. He gets up and yells "What was that"? The driver replies "Dont worry mate i just hit a aboriginal" The man replies "What was those two ticks before that"?. The driver says "I had to drive through two fences to hit the bastard"

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven was a registered sex offender.

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Why did The white man loose his black friend? Because he ran away.

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* Why is this dog barking? * Because he's a dog, if he were a cat it would meow.

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whats the difference between a chicken and a rooster. a rooster has a dick

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There were 2 strawberries sitting in a bathtub One strawberry said "Hey can you please pass the soap? The other strawberry replies "WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM A TYPEWRITER??"

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What do you call a black man with a brain injury? Mentally Disabled

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IKR! and I hear rondo and wade were in a fight too!

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Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

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Man walks into a bar, Has a few drinks and goes home.

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Why did the cupcake walk into the bar? It can't it's a cupcake

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A man gets kicked in the testicles... Ow

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Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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