Roses are red Violets are blue The sun is bright.

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What's worse than having to watch your dad rape your mom? Having to watch your mom rape your dad.

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Juan got hit by a truck Knock Knock Who's there? Juan's brother coming to stab you in the abdomen.

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Knock knock, COME IN!

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Kid: My dad's brother has gone at it with a lot of women. Friend(sarcastically): Geez that's great! When was he born? Kid: '69

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How do you get a fat man to go outside? Blow up his house

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Why was the baby crying? Because she had a frog nailed to her face.

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What does the homosexual arab who plays football who has a best friend called Dave enjoy doing? Playing football.

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Connor is such a dope, he doesn't even know Betty White jokes aren't funny.

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero Because it's impossible.

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What's the meaning of life? I don't know.

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My friends new nickname is hawk-eye! He is a jackass...

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Whats black and white and read all over? A dead magpie.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jim. Oh, come in Jim!

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What blew the baby's mind? Daddy's knuckles.

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Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What do you call it when a plane crashes into a school? A terrible accident.

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"Really, how is your wife?" "You know she's dead right?" "Cool mine too!" They high five in mid air and lived happily ever after

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Your mother is so fat that when she sits around the house, she feels bad about herself but is too embarrassed to get a gym membership and work-out in public.

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What happens when a leprechaun refuses to give you his pot of gold? He doesn't give you his gold.

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what do you call a rich, gay guy from Florida? Iron man

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what do you get when you come across a old dog with herpes, a fat man with herpes and an apple? you get nothing but the satisfaction of seeing such a horrific sight

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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