Yo' momma is so fat, that- Wait. Sorry. Too far?

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Why can't the Mexican float? He never learned the proper technique as he was not allowed to take swim class.

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What did Valerie get for her birthday? Nothing. Because no one loves her

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Q: How to make a man who suffers from hypochondria want to kill himself? A: You take a shet on his face.

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Q: A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? A:They both take turns, because they are driving across the country and it would be hard for one of them to drive the entire way.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because blind people aren't allowed to drive in the United States.

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Knock, knock! Who's there? your enemy your enemy who? your nemesis who was brutally raped and murdered last nigh.

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? It is highly unlikely one would have a supply of dead babies large enough to answer this question.

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A man punches a 3rd grader in the stomach. Not long after he is arrested and no longer is allowed within 500 feet of a public school.

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A german walks into a London Pub. He turns to the man on his left and says, " Hallo Kolleginnen und dort bar Mäzen. Ich bin gespannt zu sehen, ob wir eine Beziehung herzustellen, wie ich gesucht Gespräch, als ich in der wunderbaren Kultur, die London zu bieten hat. Ist das in Ordnung mit dir? Heil Hitler"

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What did the Big Chimney say to the Little Chimney? Nothing, chimneys are unable to talk.

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What do you a badass who not a badass. Grant Lousbury.

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If your falling up a ladder and your canoe runs out of gas, how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog houes? A. George Washington B. India C. Blue Answer: False

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Yo mama so fat, she was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes and has been instructed by her physician to exercise and regularly monitor her blood glucose levels.

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Why did the Hispanic woman cheat on her husband? Because he couldn't maintain an erection, was boring, and collected stamps.

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What's 1 + 1? Fish. What's 2+2? Window. pie.

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Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

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What did the cow say to the other cow when the boy asked him for something to drink? Probably MOOO! Considering that cows cant say anything except for that

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What do you call a boy with no arms or legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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why did the platypus fall out of a tree it couldnt even climb up the tree

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A momma tomato and a baby tomato are walking down the street, and the baby tomato starts to fall behind. The mother turns to it and says "hurry up."

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im @ work, LOL.

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What do you call Justin Bieber's assassin? A hero doing a noble favor to the community.

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How do you fit 76 babies in a bath tub... With a blender. How do you get them back out? With tortilla chips.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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