Why did the baker turn off the oven? He had run out of business

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, I died because I didn't have a heart.

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Why did the... Timmy, your mother and I are both tired.

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Q: How do you know a chinese guy robbed your house? A: your homework is done, your computer is updated, and 2 hours later he is still trying to back out of your driveway

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse answers, "Because I'm an alcoholic."

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What do you call a women with 2 black eyes? Hopefully nothing because abuse is something that shouldn't be messed with and it is wrong.

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A duck flies into a bar. The bartender allows it to stay because it turns into a beautiful swan. The goose then lays a golden egg and the bartender stares in awe as a giant bean stalk grows out of the egg. He's ecstatic and really glad he let the flamingo stay with all the wonderful colors and magic going on.

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Why can't Heller Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Knock knock Who's there? The bank. We've come to evict you from your house.

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Q: What happened to the man who died? A: Nothing, there is no afterlife.

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G

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Q. want to hear a really funny joke? A. Fred Figglie-horn

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What is the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The word anti before anti-joke.

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Q. Whats does the kid and the dog have in common? A. The kid has Herpes.

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Want to hear an anti joke? Me too thats why Im on this site.

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What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

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So everything, the chat we had before was all you know, a game so I would call you? I am not sleepy but I can wait until you can confirm everything.

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Guess Penn State Is Holding Jerry Sandusky Day this Saturday against Nebraska. All Kids 10 and Under get in Free...

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what did the bug say when it got ran over by a car? NOTHING, bugs can't talk

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A black man, a white man and an asian man jump off a building, which one will land first? Due to the equivalence principle, they will all land at the same time.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey.

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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What do you call an Ethiopian with a yeast infection? Quarter pounder with cheese.

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roses are red violets are blue i've got alzheimer's ...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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