What is the difference between Barack Obama and Simba from the Lion King? One is a cartoon character from a beloved Disney classic and the other is the current President of the United States of America.

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Man goes into a bar and orders 7 shots, the bartender says "Long day, huh?", the Man says yeh then goes home and kills himself.

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Why can't Benitio Mussolini win the war? Becuase he's dead.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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http://www.com/

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Whats worse than the Holocaust. Nothing the Holocaust was the single worst thing to happen ever.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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emma brown i did tap that shit -jackson edwards

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What do you call a black man standing on a sidewalk? Preferably race shouldn't matter in this situation, but in most social circumstances the man would be described as black to elucidate the person being depicted.

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What came first the egg or the hen? your mother did, when I had sex with her last night.

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knock knock. who's there. gestapo.

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G

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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why did hitler hate the jews... because the nazies had to pay the gas bill

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What's long, hard, and has come in it? A long, hardcovered book.

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Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth, she has lacked a jaw.

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What's the difference between me and an animal? I'm human

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why did bob fall off the swing Because he got hit by a microwave

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why was the man on the roof? he was about to commit suicide.

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Who has big muscles and is good at wrestling? A wrestler

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Knock knock? Who's there? Why don't you answer the damn door and find out for yourself?

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what did the person with yellow teeth and the person with white teeth have in common? they have a nose.

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A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Are you a tree? A: No.

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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