Why did Susie fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Why did Susie drown? Because she fell in a puddle. Knock knock Who's there Not Suzy!

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What do you can a preschool on fire? A very dangerouse situation

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya Who? Dot Com.

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yo mama is so fat she broke a branch off the family tree

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Your mom is so old she is significantly more identifiable in a crowd of middle-aged men and women.

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what's yellow and hovers? a yellow hovercraft.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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What do you say to a rock? Meow

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So a baby seal walks into a club

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What's red and hurts your teeth. Answer: a brick

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Why was the couple in the waiting room crying? Because their son was diagnosed of AIDS and will probably not live into his twenties.

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Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

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my throat Really started to hurt, like reallly badly, and i remember On sponge bob, he laughed so much his laugh box broke. well, my throat really hurts. please help! can i get my laugh box back? will i never be able to laugh again and have to get it replaced like squidward did?!!? please answer, i have a friend who would probably give me part of her laugh box, but she Laughs like a hyena

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A black kid, a white kid, an Asian, and a Dane all take acid in a room. They have a profound experience and find a greater meaning in life.

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What would happen if hitler and winston Churchill was in a bar? The police will be called to take them away as there just laying there dead

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Whats worse than getting an eye gouged out? Getting both eyes gouged out?

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Why does Santa Clause say Ho Ho Ho? He has Tuberculosis.

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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So one time there was this woman learning...

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the WNBA

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Q.who is Tiny, a lion and has no friends and is a bald eagle? A.Rory Johnston

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies on fire and a pile of living babies on fire? The dead babies are usually not as loud.

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I saw a shooting star. It shot me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops