Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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*Brother comes downstairs wet and naked* Mom: Did you enjoy your shower?

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How are a dead chicken and a woman alike? They both belong in the kitchen

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Yo momma so fat, the last time she saw 90210 was on the scale!

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Roses are red, Here's something new. Violets are violet, Not f***ing blue.

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Why did the student get the math question wrong? -Because hes dead

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Why was six afraid of seven? He wasn't. that joke is just a way to convince you that seven is a scary number.

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Whats worse than 1 bee sting? 2 bee stings? whats worse than 2 bee stings? 3 bee stings? No! The holicost Whats worse than the holicost? What? 3 Bee stings

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Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Sally had no arms. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

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What did bob get his wife for christmas? Pregnant

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The first is a person of the Jewish Faith and the other is a popular item of food.

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See what I did here? ;) Ladies, I just need some space okay? Damn Space Invaders... Ijustmetthespaceinvaderstheytookmyspace << DOUBLE MEANING!

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Two monkeys are sitting in a tree. One monkey looks to the other monkey and says, "I bet I can jump from this tree to the next tree without falling." The other monkey replies, "I'm sure you could. You're a monkey."

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why do you throw the baby up the tree??. to get me ball back.

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What's hiding in Redfoo (from LMFAO)'s afro? Nobody knows...

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A black man checks his watch. He sees that its 3:50, and calmly carries on with his day.

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whats green and dont fit? a dead epileptic.

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How do you catch a unique animal? You get professional hunters to catch the animal.

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whats a joke... Parker Coffey at life

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a black man walked into a black bar. what color was the bar afterwards? the same color. its a drinking spot not a pole

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What did the Homeless man get for Christmas? A dollar

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A lysdexic man tries to spell rentally metarded.

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A construction worker walks into a bar. He says "Ow! That hurt!" And walked in the opposite direction to the manager to complaint about the obvious health code violations of this site.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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