What's black an white and red all over? Two dead babies, one African American and one Caucasian split in half by a chainsaw.

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What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

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What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

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What is the difference between a dog and God? A dog is physical living creature while God is a supernatural being.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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Why did the seagull fly over the sea, It had wings.

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What did the blonde say when she was asked what color her hair was ? Blonde.

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Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? Probably 5

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if life throws you lemons you must be dyslexic

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Why did the boy hate his mom? She was a fucking bitch.

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Your mama's so nice, she made me cookies once. And I enjoyed them.

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Johnny: One day dad i will be tall like you! (Later that day johnny was found dead in a garbage bag)

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Who is yellow and cant drive straight. A man dying of lukemia

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why did the chicken cross the road because on the other side his wife that he had loved for years was being tortured and he was trying to save her life.

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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Q: What's small, round, and looks like a marble? A: A marble.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive a train? Because she was blind, deaf, and most likely uneducated in the field of train conduction.

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(you will only get this if you play minecraft) whats green and looks like a penis? a creeper!

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fridge

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What did the penis say to the vagina? It didnt say anything, the male said to the female "i like pickles."

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Why did the bird lose all of it's feathers? It got cancer.

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Leading a hike.. Kid falls off a cliff and dies. Who cleans him up? Bear.

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Q. What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a plastic bag? A. One is white, plastic and dangerous to young children, the other is a plastic bag.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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