Brenda said she found a pill to stop the effects of aging! It was a cyanide pill, Brenda is dead.

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I heard that the Boston marathon was a BLAST!

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How do you trick the devil? You give him a ginger.

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So there were three guys on a plane. they all died.

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what happened to the fat lady she went on a diet and is now skinny but she cant resist mcdonalds big macs so she quickly become fat

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Why are apathy,ignorance, and resentment alike? I dont know and I don't care to know.

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A guy comes home from work every day to his wife, who always seems miserable. He decides that her unhappiness is making him unhappy aswell, so he sits her down to talk things over. It turns out she is depressed because she can't get a job and the back wheels of her wheelchair are rusting.

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Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. Who cares, what was she doing out of the kitchen

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What's better than being raped by a donkey? Pie.

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Why was the little boy sad Because he has depression from his father beating him over and over every time he comes home from school...

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“Before I know it, he’s got both of my hands in his viselike grip above my head, and he’s pinning me to the wall using his lips … His other hand grabs my hair and yanks down, bringing my face up, and his lips are on mine … My tongue tentatively strokes his and joins his in a slow, erotic dance … His erection is against my belly.”

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your asshole.

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hold the planet Dumb ass well I'm doing something else right now dumb ass

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Where does Elmo live? In Sesame Street.

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What did Batman say to Superman before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

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Whats black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

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Q. Why do televisions come with clickers A. So you don't have to get up to change the channel

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Where do bees go to the bathroom? In the hive - they're incontinent.

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You mean I have to type in this little box? That's so embarrassing!

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Hey man how was the trip to Hiroshima? Great it blew my mind!! And how was Nagasaki ? It was the bomb!!

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why did dicks dicks the dicks dicks? because you're gay and dicks

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What do you call a spider with no legs? A spider.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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