What is worse then a bus driver A man who drives an ice cream truck

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thomas the train walked up to an old man and said nothing. mostly because trains cant walk, and they cant talk.

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You know what assuming leads to... .....Assumptions.

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What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

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Hey Johnny what's after 2?? 3.

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How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

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Two kids walk into a bar and get arrested for underage drinking.

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Why is it bad to smoke in a public place? Because secondhand smoke may cause lung cancer.

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What's purple and fuzzy? A piece of purple fuzz.

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roses are red violets are blue i've got alzheimer's ...

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If Oscar Meyer had a dog what kind of dog would it be? A Wiener Dog!!

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What do you call a handsome nerd? The name that is on his birth certificate.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

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Knock Knock Who's There? The I.R.S.

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What one thing do the five members of Mystery Inc have in common? They were all raped and killed by REAL MONSTERS! One of the monsters happened to be Chuck Norris. He's a BEAST!

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- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

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There is a blonde, a redhead, and a brunnette stuck on a deserted island. the redhead gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk the 100 miles back to shore. she begins swimming, gets 10 miles out, gets tired, and drowns. the brunnette gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk it too. she gets 50 miles, gets tired, and drowns. The blonde decides to escape as well. she is able to swim 98 miles, gets tired, and swims back.

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A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

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What did the priest do to the young catholic boy? Bless him.

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what is worse than finding finding an apple in your worm? Finding your peanut shells in your peanut.

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im a policeman the car infront of me had a foot hanging out of the trunk. i pulled him over. i closed the trunk and proceeded to inform him of the dangers of open trunks.

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PENIS :)

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Barman: Why the long face? Horse: To support my twelve molars and twelve premolars which help me chew grass so I can swallow it properly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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