Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

A Scotsman, an Irishman and an Englishman walk into a bar... They enjoy their drinks and leave.

Why doesnt mexico have an olympic team? Because everyone who can run, jump, or swim in already in america.

They say time heals all wounds, yet my leg still had to be amputated.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

Why was the school girl called a dork. Because a whale penis is called a dork, and she identically resembles a giant aquatic dick.

roses are black, violets are black, im dead.

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Women's Rights

What's worse than breaking your arm? Not having any arms.

two men are in a bathroom (note they are not in the same stall) the guy on the left says how are you and the guy on the right says hold on im pooping.

Roses are gray Violets are gray I really wish That I wasn't color blind

sweating like antoni with a girl

Whatsthe difference between a pile of dead babies and a chicken? Chickens don't make me laugh.

women's rights

Q: What do the Terms of Service say? A: I dont know, I didnt read them.

Q. What did the chicken do when it lost its egg? A. It went to go look for it. Q. Why was the chicken scared of the duck? A. Because it was chicken Q.Why can't chickens fly? A. Because they don't want to Q.Why can't chickens swim? A. Because they don't want to Q. Whey do chickens cluck? A. Because they want to Q. Why did the chicken jump on top of a car? A. Because it knows how Q. Why doesn't a chicken have hands? A. Because it's not human Q. What did the chicken dream about? A. Chicken dreams Q. Why was the chicken lost? A. Because it wasn't found Q. Why wasn't the chicken afriad of the dog? A. Because the chicken was blind Q. Why doesn't the chicken know how to drive a car A. Because they don't need to

What did squidward do when SpongeBob asked him to be his friend on Facebook? 1.declined it 2.got a restraining order against him 3.wondered how computer generated cartoon characters could send and decline friend requests

Knock, knock. MAN: Who's there? ... MAN: Hello? Anyone out there? ... MAN: Must be the wind.

What do you call a whale driving a plane? A horibble massacre.

Who keeps his best friend in a gun rack? a red neck.

What did the black police officer say to the white police officer? We just got a call in. Four dead children were found in an alley behind a mall.

pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooop

haha look at that guys shirt! what's wrong with it? i don't know.. nothing i guess

Knock Knock Who's there? The holocaust

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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