A preschool teacher told his class to draw a squirrel. One child proceeds to break into tears. The teacher says "what's wrong Johnny?" Johnny said "my whole family was slaughtered by a gang of squirrels!" this upset the teacher

Your in Thailand on a Elephant ride... at the end you jump off but uncle jack is still on the elephant and the elephant wont let him off.... Do you help your uncle, Jack off the elephant?

Q. Did you hear about the gay guy that's on the patch? A. yeah, that's a really big step, quitting smoking is tough

A serial killer walks into a bar... He is finally arrested after killing several people within the bar, goes to court, and it was decided that he is suffering from a rare case of maddening schizophrenia, and sent indefinitely to a mental hospital...

What do Batman and Harry Potter have in common? Their parents are dead.

What's green and can read your mind? Nothing. Some people thinks the answer is a plant but don't listen to them because they are wrong.

Q: What did the redneck say when he ran out of beer? A: I need more beer.

True fact: every rabbit lives their whole cute life.

A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

Knock Knock! Who's there? Smell mop. Smell mop who. *giggle*

Why did the boy fall out of his seat? He was being strangled with a piano wire.

Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because it wasn't a pilot it was a toaster.

What did the oboe say to the trombone? SQUEEEEEEK

What is the difference between a Camel And a Strawberry? A strawberry is red.

do,Nt loagh at me I has dislecqsia

What happened when the black woman moved to the front of the bus? There were no seats available but everyone was very nice about it. She also asked for gum. Somebody did have gum. Which was nice.

what's the difference between a crocodile?

What do you call a hispanic man hopping a large fence? A hispanic man hopping a large fence.

How many blondes does it take to skrew in a lightbulb? Usually just one.

Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

Why did the cow hail a taxi? Because cows can't drive.

whats worse than the holocaust ? ms.brinkmann? noo close....a black guy trying toget a job.

What do you call a cat without a face ? - Kitty !

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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