how many weasels does it take to change a lightbulb 0 weasels are animals and therefore are not capable of changing lightbulbs

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How do you confuse a blond? Dress up as Lady Gaga and yell "Ni!" in her face.

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Jackie Chan: Who the **** is chuck Testa? A: Chuck Testa was an internet sensation who became famous after his video on Youtube advertising his taxidermy business, Ojai Valley Taxidermy.

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What looks like half a loaf of bread. The other half

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your mother is dead.

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What do you say to a rock? Meow

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Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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What would happen if hitler and winston Churchill was in a bar? The police will be called to take them away as there just laying there dead

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Why was the couple in the waiting room crying? Because their son was diagnosed of AIDS and will probably not live into his twenties.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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my throat Really started to hurt, like reallly badly, and i remember On sponge bob, he laughed so much his laugh box broke. well, my throat really hurts. please help! can i get my laugh box back? will i never be able to laugh again and have to get it replaced like squidward did?!!? please answer, i have a friend who would probably give me part of her laugh box, but she Laughs like a hyena

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Why does Santa Clause say Ho Ho Ho? He has Tuberculosis.

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What's red and hurts your teeth. Answer: a brick

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A black kid, a white kid, an Asian, and a Dane all take acid in a room. They have a profound experience and find a greater meaning in life.

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So a baby seal walks into a club

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Whats worse than getting an eye gouged out? Getting both eyes gouged out?

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Why did the Arab bomb the US? Because it was his job.

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what better than getting an F on a test? getting an A on a test.

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares its a chicken.

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whats something you really wanna call a black person it starts with an "N" and ends in an "R" A. Friend i was joking about the "N" and "R"

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What's annoying and wears glasses? The kid next to you

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Hi I'm Ben What's your name? I forgot. Hi "I forgot" what's your name? Ben

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Your mom's house is so old, that she has rats and other various critters such as spiders, gnats, and mosquitoes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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