What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Cancer. What did he get for his birthday? He didn't make it that far...

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The awkward when you didn't actually say moment.

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Your momma's so not fat that when a school bus rolled by here house, she just sat there and turned on oprah.

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there was a Black and Mexican in a car who was driving? the cop

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What colour are blackberries? Purple.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a wanted serial killer on the run from the police

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Why didn't my marriage work out? Because I married a tangerine.

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hohifooncuiohicvsdhn ioshd

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what did the rapist say to the girl? get in the van

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I used to be able to walk, but then I took an arrow to the knee. It tore my acl and shattered my kneecap.

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Why do teens say "dude?" They feel unloved at home and must know that they posses a strong relationship with their peers, and in fact, cannot maintain a proper friendship due to the four letter word known as "dude."

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A man walks into a bar, muttering to himself. People stare at him because his severe Schizophrenia makes him stand out in social situations.

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An indian boy asked his Dad,'Why do we have such long names?' His father didn't reply, he died on the road home.

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A man walked in a bar and asked for 10 shots. (not descriptively) The bar tender got his gun out and shot the man 10 times. Another man asked for three stabs at it. The bar tender stabbed him 3 times. The last man asked for a bomb load. The bar tender gave him 100's of granades. Then the man bombed down the bar with the bar tender inside

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why did 9/11 poop on a condominium? fuk

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I love you

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You're momma is so dumb, she has troubles passing her math unit and should seriously consider a math touter

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whats worse than breaking your arm? getting raped by a squirel

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Knock, Knock ...

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

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Whats worse than 1 bee sting? 2 bee stings? whats worse than 2 bee stings? 3 bee stings? No! The holicost Whats worse than the holicost? What? 3 Bee stings

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Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

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A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

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What's not funny? Today's anti-joke writers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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