What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

What did the father give to his son with terminal cancer for his 5th birthday? Nothing the kids going to die anyway

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Sometimes I don't make sense, but when I do, I don't

Why was the boy crying? Because he got hit by a bus. Why did he get hit by a bus? Because his mom was laughing. Why was his mom laughing? Because she was driving the bus. Why was she driving the bus? Because the boy fell off a swing. Why did he fall off a swing? Because he didn't have any arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because his diabetic monkey had the flu. Why did his diabetic monkey have the flu? Because the boy was crying.

What did the boy find I'n his water? Ice

How many Jews can you fit in a car? 10. 3 in back, 2 up front and the rest in the ash tray.

What happend to the man who walked into a forrest? He got raped by a giant vicious mutant spider

Why didn't the Alzheimers patient put on her shoes? She didn't leave the elderly home that day, thus taking away the need to put on shoes.

You know what I'm thinking of right now? Eyebrows

Roses were red Violets were blue Until the Fire nation attacked Now it's all black

Nineteen terrorists walk into three airports. Several hours later, thousands of people are dead sending the world into a state of emergency that subsequently changed how we live our current lives under the constant threat of both government oppression and extremist terrorism.

How many fish does it take to brush their teeth? Jp's worth of fish isn't enough.

what do women and men have in common? nothing, women are inferior

- Knock, knock. - Who's there? - Immigration.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I was asking you...

what did the computer say to the tv? computers are not living there for they cannot talk

Why didn't Jesus like Pizza? Because Pizza doesn't exist.

What is a jew in space? Dead

Who is a pussy? Jeff Misner

Yo mama so old, she might die soon

Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

I'm 4 and what is this?

What would EARTH without ART be? EARTH, you dummy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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