knock knock. I have a doorbell, you don't have to knock.

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what was the dinosaur after it got out of the pool? wet

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Why was the girl blind, and deaf? it was hellen keller

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A blond and a brunette took an IQ test. Both of them scored above average.

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why doesnt cornelia say anything? she didnt answer

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What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

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What do you call a black pilot? Whatever his name is, you racist.

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Just open the damn door

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What do stuffed animals and living animals have in common? There both living except the stuffed animal.

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why did Sussie fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock whose there not Sussie

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Were do you find a dog with no legs ? Were you left him

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how long is a chinese name. how long. yup.

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Why did the motorcyclist die? I heard he was sat on by Chuck Norris.

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Q: How many Chuck Norrises does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: negitave 999999999999999999e

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What's worse than dropping an ice cream cone? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Dropping two ice cream cones.

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you: knock knock person: who's there you: interrupting cow person: interrupting cow you:MOOOOOOOOO

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there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

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Women are like puzzles. Because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote. Puzzles still don't

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What's the color of an apple? It varies depending on the type of tree and climate the fruit grows in.

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Why did i write this joke knowing i wont get published? I don't know.

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Why did the murderer buy a lizard? He thought that they were cute.

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*Random individual accidentally throws a ball toward another person's head while chilling out with friends* *The ball comes into contact with the victim's cranium- causing him much pain, but not serious detriment.* Q: Are you feeling okay? A: No, I'm dizzy and am currently in very bad shape Response after initial inquiry was articulated: "Uhmmmm...Sorry?" Lesson of significance to be learned from this tragic incident: One's developed, habitual reactions to certain occasions/events of particular interest are virtually always practically impossible to completely override with the means of logic when one is experiencing the relevant occurances him/herself personally. One usually finds it inordanitely difficult to free him/herself from one's regular routines.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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