how do you make a blond girl cry? kill her family

A piece of shit gets flushed down the toilet. The end.

Kids, your mother and I thought we should tell you this now... You know our dog sparky? Well he... was actually Osama bin Laden and is now dead!

Why did the duck cross the road? Because there was a gunman on the same side of the path and it would most likely be safer to avoid making eye contact

Why did the aisian man get pulled over? Because he was going over the speed limit .

What do you call your mother's bipolar brother with three arms? Uncle.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree, because it was dead. why did the second monkey fall out of the tree, becuase it was dead. why did the third monkey fall out of the tree, because he thought it was a game!

Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Oranges can't talk therefore this is not a accurate accusation.

Q-how did the blind man cross the road? A-with a guide dog

A blind man walks into a bar and orders a beer. He has gotten used to being blind all his life.

What did the tiger say to the jellyfish? Nothing; tigers can't talk. And if they could the chances of a tiger meeting a jellyfish would be very slim.

What is the biggest lie that's still close to the truth? You came out of your momma's asshole.

How do you make a baby stop screaming? Pour acid down its throat.

A man is a joke for making a joke on antijoke

One of my nipples is a different colour from the other two. Is this normal? The Doctor replied with the answer no and said you have cancer

I was bangin this girl and she kept yelling the wrong name. Who's rape??

This is an anti-joke.

Q: What does a giraffe say to the other giraffes? A: Nothing, giraffes do not have vocal cords and are therefore unable to make any sounds, much less speak; not to mention a giraffes brain is far to underdeveloped to talk in a spoken language.

It may be Stupid but its also Dumb. ~Patrick Star

How do you piss off a blind person? Tell him to piss in a round room.

69 cents for a rainbow donut shaped as a 69....

Why couldn't little Billy fall asleep. Because Billy didn't have any counting skills to be able to coins sheep

What's funny about 3 black men in a car going off a cliff? Nothing. They were my friends.

Poker? I barely even know her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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