Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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Obama being reelected.

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What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Well, a pizza is edible object provided for human consumption, and a jew is a holy human being believing in the prophet abraham.

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Uh, summa lumma dooma lumma you assuming I'm a human What I gotta do to get it through to you I'm superhuman Innovative and I'm made of rubber, so that anything you say is Ricochet in off a me and it'll glue to you And I'm devastating more than ever demonstrating How to give a motherfuckin' audience a feeling like it's levitating Never fading, and I know that haters are forever waiting For the day that they can say I fell off, they'll be celebrating 'Cause I know the way to get 'em motivated

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24

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A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

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How do you shock thomas eddison? Attatch his kite to his balls.

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Chuck norris doesnt mow his lawn, He calls someone to do it for him and then he pays them a great deal of money considering he has a large lawn.

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Why is a cookie like a jellyfish? Because it has no bones. (Contributed by my 4-year old boy)

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Why was the boy crying? Because him and his sister were sent to an orphanage.

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What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

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Whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

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Why is purple the best color. Cuz icecream has no bones

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

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Your mother is so ugly it affects her self esteem.

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knock knock Who's there? Someone who wants to save you from the shitty dinner your lazy wife made.

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roses are red vilots are blue in soviot russa poem read you.

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What is the difference between a girl and a woman? Age

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Yo momma's so ugly. Most people do not enjoy looking at her

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What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

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Ask Me If I'm A Piece of Bread Are You a Piec--- Nope

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how do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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