Why did Phil Krahn cross the road? Because he is gay

why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

Bob Saget

When life throws you lemons, your first instinct is to make lemonade. Due to your severe lemon allergy, however, you will die within several minutes and therefore have no viable method of creating said lemonade. You die horribly and your death sparks a movement against the biological warfare of life.

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

roses are red violets are blue tis poem makes no sense so screw you

Your wife died during the delivery.

how do you save a black person that's drowning? you blow up their lips

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, It's still in its pen.

What's a fun thing to do on a plane? Make a bolt to the pilot, smash his brains in with a iron pipe and make the plane plummet a few hundred feet with a maniacal laugh until you wake up from your dream and scream at your mother to wipe you.

Have you seen that ad about starving children in Africa? It was pretty gay

Adolf the Red-Nosed Hitler

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

Q: What did the shark say while eating the surfer A: Nothing, his mouth was full, and besides....sharks cannot talk.

I used play skyrim...but then I realsied I had a lot of exams so I had to stop

What was the cancer patients last wish? For the pain to go away...Yolo...-Avery Scott Vartanian

Why didnt Stevie Wonder wave back at the white man? Because he's a racist.

Why did the long term smoker suddenly stop smoking? Because he had a heart attack.

.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

What do you call a skeleton in your closet? Evidence of a brutal crime. You should probably call the cops.

How many seeds does a watermelon have? None. It is seedless.

Your mother is so dumb, that she had a very poor ACT composite score.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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