.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

How many seeds does a watermelon have? None. It is seedless.

Knock knock Who's There? Woo? Woo who? Stop celebrating and let me in.

Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? Holocaust

How do you knock a clown off a swing? Hit it with an axe multiple times.

why is dog animal? it is not fish! 18 fits of has hair only have is Buddhist

Why did the man buy his wife expensive flowers? It was their anniversary and he is a faithful husband.

What do you call a skeleton in your closet? Evidence of a brutal crime. You should probably call the cops.

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, I died because I didn't have a heart.

Your mother is so dumb, that she had a very poor ACT composite score.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Parkinson's dl;ghd;jgfldsj;foshdgoljdlkfnjslpaoijejknjvnoidnmaokepinjndonfvio

Q: What did blue say to red? A: Let's make some purple

Why did my pussy get wet? Because I splashed him with water. LOL SO FUNNY OMFG DA BEST JOKE EVA!!

what do you get if you cross the mafia and the yakuza? a hefty bounty on your head

What's worse than finding out your dad has AIDS? Finding out your little brother also has it, but you and your mother don't.

what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

How can you tell if a man has an erection? His penis is no longer flaccid

Tall asians

why did the girl stop laughing? there was nothing to laugh about.

A paralysed man falls over.

When writing haikus Sometimes, I miscount the syllables See, that line has eight.

Why did litltle Susie drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

did you know r kelly and jay z had a album together?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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