Stranger at door: *Knock knock* Oliver Twist: Who's there? Stranger at door: Not your parents.

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Weebles wobble, but paralyzed kids fall down.

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What's the difference between a lamp?

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Bob Saget

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Jimmy: Knock Knock Nick: Whose there? Jimmy: Joe Nick: Joe Who? Jimmy: Joe Mamma Nick: No shes dead.

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What did the Muslim say to the Jew? Nothing, as he has been deaf since birth and is incapable of forming coherent speech.

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What do homeless people get at Christmas? Cold.

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What does a blonde's pussy taste like? The same as her brain, cabbage.

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A chicken crosses the road and goes into a bar and recites the following poem: Roses are red Violets are blue Knock Knock Who's there? Sugar is sweet Sugar is sweet who? And so are you. The bartender was confused considering she's a blonde. A genie appears and says to the Mexican he'll grant him 3 wishes. The black guy, the white guy, and the jew were at the bar also. The priest was also drinking. They all had a great time.

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After pursuing a speeding vehicle for 10km at speeds ranging from 120 - 160km/h, the police officer managed to stop the driver. The driver of the vehicle rolled down the window and asked, "What seems to be the problem officer?" to which the police officer replied, "It sounds like one of your cylinders is firing incorrectly, you have a fairly large amount of carbon build-up on and around your exhaust pipe."

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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If you go to a restaurant and you have more food on your plate then someone who is obese, you KNOW you have too much food.

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This is the concept of anti-joke.

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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You know what's addicting? Heroine.

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Why do jews love money so much? Because money is very valuable and everyone loves it.

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A boy and a girl are each granted a wish Girl: I want us to be lovers until the end of the world Boy: I want the world to end

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Why Was the straight man in love ? because he was an intelligent human being who had the formula of understanding woman .

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How do you double any amount of cash? Stack it up and fold it in half.

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What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

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What is the biggest lie in the world How the **** should I know

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What did the black man say before he went to sleep? im going to sleep

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why did John fall off his bike I don't know I was not there it was a rumor at school

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Poems are great but sometimes they don't make refridgerater

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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